By Mark

Of my seniors, some may graduate, some may become a statistic.

Of the total FTE in my building, some may have jobs next year, some may be RIF'd.

Of the courses on the master schedule, some classes may be scratched, some may be cobbled together.

I may decide to stay in the classroom. So much depends.

All of these this-or-thats will be decided in May. How appropriate.

I am an English teacher, but I did have to look up the definition of "may," since my natural conversational usage of the concept tends toward use of might rather than may. It turns out that may is an auxiliary or modal verb which communicates uncertain potentiality whether in present or future applications–in addition to the sense of permission I demand when my students ask if they can go to the bathroom and I answer "I sure hope so, if not, let me know and I'll send you to the nurse" and they quickly revise to ask if they may go to the bathroom.

Uncertain potentiality is a big reason I'm no fan of May.

I grew up in the same house from age two to age seventeen. My parents (the original ones) are still married to one another. I like predictable cycles. I like knowing what's next–for the big things at least.

For many teachers, the assumption is that the crankiness and hallway grumbling common to May is a symptom of a long year having passed. There used to be an epidemic of "reply-all" emails that would make the rounds in my building to spread and incite venomous, shrill, and irrational May interactions held e-witness to all not bold enough to simply hit delete on sight. "It's May, we're all tired, we're all on edge," was the explanation.

For me, it isn't so much that the home stretch is so grueling (though I'll admit it is grueling). May is about uncertain potentialities. 

What will the forecasting numbers show? Will I have to be the union rep present when RIF notices go out? How, exactly, will teachers from my department not be RIF'd when everyone and their classroom hamster is certified in English, so when the elective classes don't fill or social studies classes are given to CTE teachers, and the higher-seniority elective and social studies teachers then get pushed over to teach English classes…and some of the best new hires our district was ever bright enough to invest in fall on the other side of the line…?

What will be the next edutrend foisted on us in August? What fine print in public policy will manifest with fangs in the next cycle? What will be the next social ill for which teachers are to blame? (The 2011-2012 school year saw teachers blamed for everything from the mortgage fiasco and teen pregnancy to unemployment and child obesity.)

I suppose I can blame my pessimistic lens on the long haul leading up to May. I blame the most of it, though, on the insanity of uncertain potentiality our system inflicts upon itself every year.

If there's anything I've learned after teaching classroomsful of students with ADHD for ten years, its that predictability and clarity, stability and routine are critical keys to long term success. No wonder we can't keep focus as an institution. It's all about May.

Or may not.